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Andy

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(no subject) [Aug. 29th, 2009|03:18 am]
Andy
Smell my glove.
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Book of Jelothoth - Jelothoth on the Nature of the Beginning [Apr. 7th, 2008|07:41 pm]
Andy
In the beginning there was a large void in the middle of some fairly cool shit. You know, like a parking lot in the middle of urban sprawl. This little slice of multiverse wasn't being used by anyone, cause Martin was a bit of a cunty landlord, you know? Kind of guy what doesn't let you have a goldfish in your apartment, let alone a series of planets containing sustainable life.

Needless to say, I was pretty tired of driving past this big patch of nothing (you try driving through infinite Nebraska). I figured I could do something with it. Never actually wanted to though, too much work running a universe. Just ask any deity. Oh, sure, Yahweh makes it sound easy with his 'Idiots Guide to Building a Universe in Seven Days' book, but he used Open Source.

If there's one thing that deities do, it's gamble. Check out any story featuring my buddy Zeus, Yahweh and Satan, or any of the other dudes I hired to work on my worlds. It's a bad habit, we know, but what else are you going to do with just short of forever? That's what I thought.

Now, one day me and Marty were out watching some other groovy cats playing Pogs. Martin, he's a bit tipsy, you know?

"Jelothoth, bro, that dude in the fucking horns is going to kick that fat guy's ass," he said.

"Fuck that shit, Marty," I said. "Vikngr is going down in a blaze of shit."

"Fine," he said. "I bet you 93 billion light years Vikngr wins all over this joint."

Martin was wrong, of course. I grabbed up his 93 billion and ran with it. Set up some stars, couple planets, a few nebulas, copied, pasted, edited, pen tooled, and typographied all over the blank space. Got a couple buds together and got shit rolling on Earth and a few other points out in the sky. You know, got to keep shit going.
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ceci n'est pas une post [Aug. 10th, 2007|05:24 pm]
Andy
Sahasrala is in the hilly desolate place.
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...And hell followed with him [Mar. 29th, 2007|03:03 pm]
Andy
[Current Mood |amused]

Today I have received a four bladed razor. This alone is no reason to go batty. Certainly no enough reason to write about it on the internet.

No, there is some other foul business afoot here. The thing vibrates as it shaves. This is a sign of the end times. If you believe in a deity, you are welcome to begin praying to it at any time. If you don't, join me in placing a paper bag over our heads and cowering under large wooden tables.
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLL THE RAINDROPS KEEP FALLING ON MY HEAD [Mar. 1st, 2007|11:45 pm]
Andy
[Current Mood |cheerful]

It's been a year and a half, (roughly) since I posted song lyrics.
Suck on it:

I've had it with this town
I never saw those shifting skies
I never saw the ground
Or the sunset rise
I want to live on an abstract plane

I'm building a frame
A place to put my ten-yard stare
Thinking of that paint
Painted en plein-air
I want to live on an abstract plane

I need a new address
I want some new terrain
Is it north or south?
I want to live on an abstract plain

I could sit on the roof
On top of that abstract house
See my abstract view
An abstract mouse
I want to live on an abstract plane

I need a new address
Tell me I'm not insane
Is it up or down?
I want to live on an abstract plane
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Culture is Not Your Friend [Feb. 17th, 2007|02:59 pm]
Andy
It's a rather old video, but, meh:

YouTube VideoCollapse )
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Mad lewt [Dec. 25th, 2006|11:35 pm]
Andy
[Current Mood |cheerful]

Before I woke up this morning I had none of the Beatles' work on CD. I know own copies of both The Beatles' White Album and Revolver at no personal expense! Which is the best possible way to come across anything.
God bless this consumerist deathtrap known as Christmas.

Also: my Samson hath been removed.
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(no subject) [Dec. 19th, 2006|10:56 pm]
Andy
[Current Mood |Melodramatic Squenix Villian]

ALL THAT YOU WANT!!TONS OF DRUGS OF PRESCRIPTION!!!!
!!FREE TEEN TRAMADOL!!
!!FREE HARDCORE PHENTERMINE!!
!!WATCH GLAMOROUS PORNSTARS GETTING A HARD TRAMADOL PHENTERMINE SHAKE!!!
!!NICE PHENTERMINE!!
!!BUSTY SLUT GETS HER TRAMADOL LICKED THEN PHENTERMINE!!
!!SPORTY BLONDE RECEIVES WAWAWAWAWAWAWA AND UEEEEEEEEEEEE ON HER CANNOT WILL GET ACQUAINTED WITH GIRLS!!
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in two hours I'll be free for winter break [Dec. 19th, 2006|12:29 pm]
Andy
this is both valid and fail at the same time
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(no subject) [Dec. 19th, 2006|01:56 am]
Andy
[Current Mood |cheerful]

Look, I have to tell you something...
Grab shotgun.
...we will never be...
Chamber shotgun.
...more than just...
Place barrel of shotgun firmly in mouth.
...friends...
Fire.
...sorry about this note, but I can't change the way I feel.
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